Okay, so I *might* have a well documented school-supply hoarding situation. Bottom line: if it’s on deep discount, I’ll buy it, and at any given moment, I am completely capable of opening my own OfficeMax. My coworker used to just find my stash impressive, but now when I text her my victories, she just finds it concerning.
Me: Target clearance! I just scored 77 spiral notebooks for $8!!!
Michelle: Okay, that’s awesome, but how many can you possibly use?
Me: I use them!
Michelle: You used maybe 20 last year.
Me: See! I’m covered for almost 4 years!
Michelle: And the 200 you already have in the closet?
To be clear…if you’ve been reading this blog AT ALL, you’ll be just as shocked as I am, that I’ve managed to raise a child with common sense bordering on prudishness, but somehow, THAT happened.
Caolinn: “The only good thing about the locker room in gym, is that now I know who I will and will not be hanging out with.”
Me: “What are you talking about?”
Caolinn: “Oh, you can totally tell who’s going nowhere in life, just by seeing their panties. You’re wearing a hot pink thong with a hashtag on the crotch? Pretty sure you’re not making good decisions. Same for the girls with ‘sexy’ written on the ass. You’re fourteen…who is that for? And those stupid Marvel panties that you and I saw in Target and made fun of? Yeah…I’ve seen them on two different people. Be your own hero, damn it.”
For the record, this is what she’s talking about, where feminism and common sense took a dump in Target’s Junior’s department.