My sons’ Spanish teacher has apparently given up, and the curriculum now solely consists of them watching Spanish soap operas.
Xavier: “None of us understand enough Spanish, so it’s just a bunch of gibberish, and then a dog runs away, and someone has an affair.”
Liam: “Don’t forget about the ghosts.”
Xavier: “Oh, yeah…and there are ghosts.”
(After four consecutive episodes of Sons Of Anarchy)
Me: “Huh.”
R: “What?”
Me: “You know this is really just a soap opera set in a biker gang.”
R: *horrified look* “A soap opera!? What do you base that on?”
Me: “All the slapping. Seriously. They’re just some shoulder pads and a push into a pool away from being Dynasty.”
R: “I’ve never watched Dynasty, but I’m guessing that it didn’t have a fat hairy guy going down on two strippers on a biker bar pool table, white supremacists blinding a guy with a pool cue, or a guy named ‘Half-Sack’ constantly showing off his partially empty scrotum.”
Me: “Yeah…Dynasty could have been WAY better.”
(Six episodes later…)
Me: “Okay, I think we’ve officially watched too many episodes, in a row.”
R: “How can you POSSIBLY say that?”
Me: “Because I’m starting to appreciate the way Jax walks, and you know how much it used to annoy me. Seriously, I’m terrified I’m now going to be attracted to swaggering men in dirty leather.”
R: *switching channels* “Annnnnnd, Big Bang Theory it is…”
Fisticuffs and Shenanigans 