Yet another fantastically heretical Easter Sunday conversation, albeit this time by text with my favorite Jewish doctor.
Drew: Are you done with that whole chocolate egg thing that your people pretend is connected to Jesus, yet.
Me: The kids were done hours ago. Now they’re Skyping with their father.
Drew: Oh great. Is he correcting your parenting from afar, again?
Me: He’s telling them, to tell me, to email him their report cards, and I’m biting my tongue from saying, “Sure, but tell him to send child support”.
Drew: Well, he might actually do it! It is your people’s day of miracles, after all.
Me: I’m pretty sure that we used all of our miracle cache on that resurrection thing. No dice.
Drew: If he does, can we say he “rose from the deadbeat”?
Me: I love you so much right now.
Fisticuffs and Shenanigans 