Let’s All Just Be Happy I Didn’t Teach Your Toddlers How To Play Craps And Use the F-Word.

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Shockingly, my best friend, Tracy and her husband, left me with their 1-year-old twins for the night.  I know…I know…who do you call CPS on first?

Ryan: How’s the babysitting? They’re down for the night, yes?

Me: Sleeping like baby angels!

Ryan: How many times have they checked in?

Me: Just twice.  I did just send them this…

Dear Tracy and Tim,

Thank you for entrusting me with your two perfect babies. We are having a wonderful time. A few notes… First, you might notice that your son now calls you “Mummy” with a British accent. We apologize, Xavier thought it would be funny. Also, your other nephew, Liam has some concerns that my fake theatrical crying (when I stubbed my toe) might have made your daughter develop an ‘overdeveloped sense of schadenfreude’. His words, not mine. Lastly, I hope you don’t mind that your darlings now call raisins by their proper name…”Lies”.

Miss you! Hugs!
Megan

Ryan: Okay, two issues…  First, what is your issue with raisins?

Me: They’re the worst things that ever happened.  Overstating?

Ryan: But, they had those really cool commercials in the 80’s.  They had merchandise!

Me: If they were so great, they never would have had to sing and dance. The only reason chocolate advertises, is to keep you from buying OTHER chocolate.

Ryan: Point made.

Me: What’s the other issue, you said there were two issues?

Ryan: Oh, just that they’re never going to leave you alone with their children again.

Me: Agreed.