Shockingly, my best friend, Tracy and her husband, left me with their 1-year-old twins for the night. I know…I know…who do you call CPS on first?
Ryan: How’s the babysitting? They’re down for the night, yes?
Me: Sleeping like baby angels!
Ryan: How many times have they checked in?
Me: Just twice. I did just send them this…
Dear Tracy and Tim,
Thank you for entrusting me with your two perfect babies. We are having a wonderful time. A few notes… First, you might notice that your son now calls you “Mummy” with a British accent. We apologize, Xavier thought it would be funny. Also, your other nephew, Liam has some concerns that my fake theatrical crying (when I stubbed my toe) might have made your daughter develop an ‘overdeveloped sense of schadenfreude’. His words, not mine. Lastly, I hope you don’t mind that your darlings now call raisins by their proper name…”Lies”.
Miss you! Hugs!
Ryan: Okay, two issues… First, what is your issue with raisins?
Me: They’re the worst things that ever happened. Overstating?
Ryan: But, they had those really cool commercials in the 80’s. They had merchandise!
Me: If they were so great, they never would have had to sing and dance. The only reason chocolate advertises, is to keep you from buying OTHER chocolate.
Ryan: Point made.
Me: What’s the other issue, you said there were two issues?
Ryan: Oh, just that they’re never going to leave you alone with their children again.