When Oral Reports Take A Dark Psychological Turn…

(While giving an oral report on giraffes in preparation for our upcoming zoo trip.)

Student: “One interesting fact about giraffes is that they can fall in love…and they can be destroyed.”

Me: “Ummmmm.”

If You’re Waking Me Up Before 9am On a Holiday…There Better Be Inappropriate Nudity Involved.

How I was woken up on the Fourth of July, this year…

Unknown Number:

 

Me: Who is this!?  I don’t have this number saved, but I totally want to make out with you for this gif.

 

Unknown Number:

 

 

And yes, the above picture really IS my friend Daniel, who wasn’t in my phone, and who, apparently, can rock the fuck out of a bikini.