When He Goes To Jail, I Hope Someone Sexually Violates Him With A Spring Roll

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If you’re American, and you don’t live in a fucking cave, then you’ve heard about Ray Rice roughly every fifteen seconds, for the last month, and not for enviable reasons. So imagine my surprise, when I open my email, this morning, and I see an email entitled “Rice Is Nice!”  Whaaaa?  Who sent this, the She-Was-Askin’ -For-It Society?  Nope…just an ad for Pei Wei, in which they either have the WORST timing of all time, or they’re trying to remind us that before Rice was synonymous with wife-beating…that we found it rather delicious with reheated, faux-Asian shrimp dishes.

Rice

 

Nice work, Pei Wei.  Maybe next week you’ll get lucky and a TNT factory will explode, causing countless casualties, so you can get more attention for your Thai Dynamite Chicken.