I’d Like To Use My Phone-A-Friend, Regis



A text conversation with our favorite angry physician.

Me: Hey, I need you to settle a bet.  How long was Noah’s flood?

Drew: You do realize that I’m in Dubai on business, right?

Me: I do, but I’m on the clock, here.

Drew: You know who’s NOT on the clock?  Google.

Me: *sigh*

Drew: Fine.  40 days of rain, 160 on the Ark, 150 days until the water receded, and on the 10th day after that they sent out the birds.


Drew: Why are you betting on biblical facts, by the way?

Me: I’m not.

Drew: ???

Me: I was betting Matt that you’d know that obscure crap, and that I could get you to tell me from Dubai inside of two minutes. (92 seconds, by the way)

Drew *slow clap*

(5 minutes later)

Me: Hey, do you happen to know the names of his sons’ wives?

Drew: Fuck you.