And Only Because My Moat Isn’t Ready For My Narwhal.

Me: “Hey, when we win the Powerball tonight, whoever is the nicest gets the first pony.”

Caolinn: *eye roll*

Me: “I saw that.”

Xavier: “Guess who’s getting a three-legged pony with mange?”

Liam: “That’s gonna be one messssssed up pony.”

Only One Of These Men Can Bag Angelina Jolie…

Maybe my son has a point.

Me: “Are you ever, for any reason, allowed to use my laptop?”

Caolinn: (deep sigh) “No….”

Me: “Are you even allowed to use it for school?”

Caolinn: (deep sigh) “No….”

Me: “Are you even allowed to use it to email your grandparents?”

Caolinn: (deep sigh) “No….”

Me: “So do you think, that under any circumstances, that your using my computer, to prove to your brother that Brad Pitt and Billy Ray Cyrus were not the same person, was going to be okay?”

Caolinn: (deep sigh) “No….”