It should come as no surprise that Ryan and I are lapsed Catholics. I’m 90% sure if we stepped across the threshold of a church, that flames would erupt.
Ryan: You going to church?
Me: Why would I go to church? In the middle of the week?
Ryan: It’s Ash Wednesday.
Me: Ohhhhhhh…that. No, I don’t want schmutz on my head. I’m going to Costco, though. Need anything?
Ryan: Costco instead of church. What would Jesus say?
Me: He’d say ‘Don’t buy the giant thing of chicken salad, again, you’ll never finish it.’.
Ryan: What would your grandmother say?
Me: She’d say I was going to hell…and to ignore Jesus and get the chicken salad, so she can score half of it.
Fisticuffs and Shenanigans 
Ash Wednesday? Is that what Joe Biden was up to in that picture where he had a black smudge on his forehead?
That’s the deal!
Ha! Wasn’t expecting the last part of the last part! haha
Grandma was good for that. 🙂
I’ve never heard of a lapsed Catholic. I am a “recovering catholic”. I suspect they are the same.
Exactly the same! I use them interchangeably. 🙂
As a fellow ‘lapsed Catholic’ I can relate. Although instead of churros
…. (damn phone) instead of churros my place of worship has fishing supplies to each their own.
I, too, suffer from the phone. 🙂
I was wondering why everyone was getting fish fries for lunch Wednesday. I had taco soup – with beef in it. Yum!
You only have to worry about the meat thing on Fridays. Or never, if you don’t do dogma!
Dogma totally not my thing. Now today being Friday? Pizza night! No anchovies either!
Sushi!!!
This literally made me laugh out loud.
Awwww, some good news today. I needed that. 🙂
Jesus would support the purchase of a giant tub of pork rinds. At least, that’s what I tell myself when I buy them.
As long as you’re not Jewish or Muslim, or Catholic on Fridays!
Great, now Jesus is crying and I’m going to have to spend the rest of my day talking him off the ledge. You suck.
If he’s feeling vulnerable. Score is some unicorns!
“Talking Jesus off the ledge”? Is that what the kids are calling it these days?
Good ol Granny. Alway thinking ahead 😂