Things my mother REALLY doesn’t like…violence, guns, tattoos, motorcycles, and men with long hair, so NOTHING about this conversation makes sense.
Mom: You watch Sons of Anarchy, right?
Me: Yeah. Why?
Mom: There’s a quiz online for you to find out which character would be your husband. (Sends link)
Me: Lol…okay. Mom where did you find this, you’ve never even seen an episode of that show.
Mom: I got Jax and from description he looked pretty good. Heh heh heh.
Me: Jesus, Mother.
And, mom…because I know you’re going to read this…a gift from me to you.
Please excuse the fact that he looks like sexy Jesus, here.
Fisticuffs and Shenanigans 
She wasn’t alone in being drunk at 8am.
I guzzled a glass of what I believed was water with
my thyroid medication this morning.
It was vodka.
And I can’t imagine how that got there.
Which is a lie, of course.
And I don’t need no frigging quiz to tell me Jax would be my
husband. Let’s just be honest, he’d be all our damn husbands.
Okay, that just made me laugh incredibly hard. 🙂
It’s only fair since you make me laugh more than you can imagine. And conveniently at times when I really need it.
And if we’re done sucking each other’s dicks, we can resume our normal evening activities, which in my case, obviously involves vodka.
Ahhhhh, girl. If you knew how much I love you right now. LOL And for the record, I just did the quiz and I got Juice. Who I would have chosen, so YAY ME!
Q: What’s the difference between a Hoover and a Harley?
A: The Hoover has the dirt-bag on the inside…
*snort* I was waiting for a sucking joke that never came.
“That never came.” Hee hee hee.
Damn it! 🙂
I like the sexy Jesus comment. That’s not one that’s used often. Lol.
Not in the bible belt, anyway. lol
I’m from Alabama, I totally get it! 🙂
I did some time in Texas…I feel ya, sister.
He would be so much cuter if he shaved his face and kept the short hair. It took me like half a season to realize that he cut his hair hahaha
It took me four seasons to find out he was actually British. 🙂
Spoiler alert LOL. I didn’t know that!
Only in real life! Only in real life! lol
Now I’m feeling kinda left out, because I have no idea what this Sons of Anarchy is all about. It looks as though I’ve been missing something good though!
How do you feel about naked asses and gunplay? If you’re in favor…this is your show.
I took that quiz and got Jax as well. It also disturbed me when my friend said he looked like Jesus. Nooooo!
HA! You and my mom are sister wives. 🙂
I have seen it either, but I am glad that I got Jax too 😉 and I do like violence, guns, tattoos, motorcycles, and men with long hair….So yeah!
I love how everyone other than me got Jax. That guy gets around. 🙂
😆
Glad to see that some women think with the lady bits as much as men do with their dangly bits. I agree with the actor, not so much the character. Good luck explaining that all to mom. 😀
I wish I could tell you she would find that odd…but, she’s met me. Sigh.
Try imagining mom with a man like that. Once you get over the trauma, we’ll talk.
Worse, my mother would have Gemma as her mother in law. Dear Lord.
Wait… You’re mother would consider marriage?! I would think at her age, she would be settling for living in sin only. Words fail me. XD
Well, there is the whole thing where she’s married to my father, still. AWWWWWKWARD.
My mother’s been sending me congratulatory emails praising me for getting a new job… to my WORK email. Where I will be transferring departments in 3 weeks.
LMAO! Keep it on the DL, mom!
I’m in the middle of binge watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix. (I’m up to season 5.) That last photo isn’t just a gift for your mother. It’s a gift to everyone reading your blog! 🙂
But what if I could get him oilier. 🙂
Even better!
I still think he is cute. I could sent him to have the tatoos lasered off, melt the guns, dump the bike for a Jag and with a good haircut and suit – he could be my favorite spy…
Ladies and Gentlemen…MY MOTHER.
:-0
I’m reading this at work, got to the picture at the bottom and the phone rang. I kinda forgot my name for a second. lol
He is pretty, isn’t he. 🙂
Yeah. 😁
My mother is your mother’s polar opposite. I grew up surrounded by bikers with tatts and long hair. It was, at the time, what I thought ‘normal’ families did. Imagine my shock when my father dropped me off at my friend’s house, on the bike, when I was a teenager and her mother’s horror at my father! I was absolutely floored to realize all Dads didn’t ride bikes like that!
If my mother gets hives when even getting near a motorcycle. The woman didn’t make me make any promises about sex or drugs…but made it clear I was NEVER to get on the back of a bike. lol When I got a tattoo, I had to tell her I was pregnant (I was 21), and then said, “Nope, just kidding…it’s just a tattoo”. She still hates me. 🙂
LOL – and my mother set me up with bikers, total different worlds it seems. A tattoo? *hides self from your mother whispers* 12.
I have two now…but I’m dreaming of a third. I just have to have the right one, and then it’s mine. 🙂
One must be careful when picking, for sure. 3 of mine are for my living children, 5 for the ones that I either lost or did not survive their first month, one is for my Grandmother who passed, One for my sister who passed, one I got on my 20th wedding anniversary (but not his name), and my most recent is a stylized semicolon for the Semicolon project – which if you do not know what that is, I can tell you privately 🙂