When Oral Reports Take A Dark Psychological Turn… Standard (While giving an oral report on giraffes in preparation for our upcoming zoo trip.) Student: “One interesting fact about giraffes is that they can fall in love…and they can be destroyed.” Me: “Ummmmm.” Share this:TwitterFacebookEmailLinkedInPinterestTumblrRedditLike this:Like Loading... Related
28 thoughts on “When Oral Reports Take A Dark Psychological Turn…”
Giraffes are Praying Mantises, since when?
Right? I feel he needs to provide the class with a follow-up report.
You tempt fate, you know. If he’s creative you’ll end up with something only SyFy would produce.
I want a co-producer credit.
Best of luck working yourself into that contract 😀
“Wanna pass 9th grade?”
I’ve been destroyed by love, otherwise known as “giraffed.”
As it will he known forevermore.
Be, damn it! Be!!!
I got ya.
And they forgot that they beat the shit out of each other with their necks…it’s actually pretty crazy and hilarious…have fun looking that one up…that should be the official meaning of “giraffed”
Next time I want to fight…I’m going in neck first. That should work AWESOME. lol
Apparently you really don’t want to fuck with giraffes, as they can kick you into next week…
“you really don’t want to fuck with giraffes”
That has to be the first time someone ever wrote that.
Oh my…..too funny.
The danger of too much necking…
Think of all the spots, you’d get…
My mother told me that was what would happen.
Oh shit. Does this mean I’m a giraffe???
Depends…how are you at getting leaves out of a 15ft tree, and is your tongue 10 in long?
(and if so…congrats to your lady friends)
I never lick and tell.
If only everyone had such standards.
Hmmmmm. That’s what happens when humans act irresponsible in front of animals. They see what we do and mimic us. Lord help us if they start sexting on stolen smart phones. How do you explain THAT to the Grand Jury.
I can’t imagine the level of autocorrect needed with those enormous hooves. And if I get sexted by a giraffe, I’m hanging up my uterus…DONE.
I put masking tape on all the little cameras on my phone just to make sure.
Perhaps what the student was referring to was not destruction by neck-rotizing smashy-itis, but the fact that, prior to getting it on, boy giraffes are expected to go down on girl giraffes. While thirsty.
I can understand that to the student, quaffing the p#ss of your beloved as a prelude to lovemaking might seem like step on the Road to Peedition.
I’m not sure whether I’m alarmed about all the golden showering going on in giraffe-land, or just ridiculously impressed that you know their mating habits. I’m going to go with both on this one. lol And suddenly I’m more content with the human ritual, of the human male first buying you dinner. 🙂