Although, I’m Pretty Sure Goldie Hawn Could Have Birthed The Anti-Christ


D’Avonte: “Miss McMcerson, what’s the name of that movie…the guy’s like a carpenter or something.”

Me: “Jesus?”


Annnnnnd the movie ended up being Overboard. I was SO damn close.

55 thoughts on “Although, I’m Pretty Sure Goldie Hawn Could Have Birthed The Anti-Christ

  1. There’s a whole compendium of family jokes that revolves around y mother’s affection for this movie. It includes random quotes and the fact that it gets watched whenever it’s on television, in spite of the fact that my dad bought her her own copy.

  2. As a former adoring admirer of The Black Crowes, I can confirm that the birth of Kate Hudson was indeed an anti-christ watershed moment.

    Thanks Goldie…

    Yoko Ono-style, she destroyed the band.

    Or at least, that’s what the rumours were…

  3. Is NO one else going to get on your case about your knee-jerk set of programmed Catholic responses?:

    “You say carpenter-I say ‘Jesus'”
    “You say fisherman-I say Simon Peter”
    “You say virgin-I say Mary”
    “You say slut-I still say Mary”

    (YOU know: That OTHER Mary.)

    Well, if no one else is, I won’t either.

  4. Well, given the limited amount of info you were given, Jesus is a pretty good guess.

    That’s a pretty good guess in almost any circumstances where you are given nondescript info:

    “The guy with the shoes”
    “The guy with no shoes”
    “The guy with his bros”
    “The guy who was friend zoned by girls”
    “The guy who was sad”
    “The guy who was kind”

    And so on! Jesus is the LBD of movies, really.

  5. Devonte needs to be introduced to “The Lion in Winter”… Although I’m pretty sure you’ll be hearing that cattiness several times through the year after he’s seen it…

    …I should know, I still use, “Love… In a world where carpenters get resurrected, anything’s possible…”

  6. brilliant guess on your part. this got me thinking (and I usually think too much) – when all the hype was brewing about the movie – passion of the Christ, mr. dayinthelife loved to say to hardcore Christians (I love to put the adjective “hardcore” in front of Christian), “I’d go see the passion of the Christ, but I already read the book.” or, “the bummer with that movie is that we already know how it ends.” he was always meant with a blank stare. Christians were all, “huh?”

  7. Doug in Oakland

    I may have solved the Kate Hudson=anti-Christ puzzle:
    Remember in Tombstone when Val Kilmer said “Yes, you’re a good woman, but on the other hand you may be the anti-Christ”?

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