Caolinn: “You’re an idiot.”
Xavier: “Yeah, well, you’re ugly.”
Me: “Hey! You wouldn’t talk to the dog that way, so do not talk to your siblings that way.”
Xavier: (whispering) “Unibrow.”
Me: “Hey! What did I JUST get done saying!?”
Xavier: “Well, I WOULD say that to the dog…I say it all the time, he has a huge unibrow.”
Me: (rethinks policy on strangling)
22 thoughts on “This Is Why My Parents Didn’t Think I Needed A Sibling.”
It’s amazing how children can navigate the smallest opening in microseconds. Caolinn will undoubtedly need to remain ever alert and sharp witted to survive Xavier’s Lightening fast thought processes. I suppose this is the reason parents used blunt force carefully applied to the posterior of any sharp point made by a cheeky child. They are just too dang fast to reason with. 😳
Seriously…the spanking…it has it’s place. And it’s place is square on the ass. 🙂
Did the two of them ever hit themselves and blame the other for instigating the trouble? My younger brother used to do that all the time when we were traveling with either parent. It took almost a year for my brother to finally get caught doing that prank.
Of course it didn’t help matters any when my brother started it and by the time my parents intervened, I was already trying to smack the shit out of him.
LMAO! No, not to my knowledge, but they did smack the crap out of each other frequently when they were younger. The perils of twin boys…
My brother and my language at that time was more R rated, assuming of course that the parents couldn’t hear us. –Curt
Mine still cover their ears and hum when someone is about to say “ass” or “bitch” during a movie. I’ll give you a minute to process that they’re this prude about language and I’m their mother. 🙂 No one…I mean NO ONE is as good as being a secret cusser as I am.
(Clearly Caolinn I’ve given up with, now that she’s in public high school…why fight a losing battle.)
Our kids, who are approaching 40, still hum on occasion. 🙂
Little brothers can be the worst …said the little brother who used to see “the worst” as his job description and sacred duty.
Hey, it’s good to live up to your job description!
Just get a super soaker. I’m sure the dog wouldn’t like that either. 😉
The dog will start shitting in my shoes as a means of revenge if I do that. 🙂
Well we don’t want that. Back to the drawing board.
As in the cookie with the chips or the pirates?
Um…why are we only having one? Damn it, Dan…this is important…we need EVERYTHING.
Hmmm… cookie eating pirates. I LIKE it.
But, do you have a unibrow? Because if you do, you could be a werewolf and that could be hot, right? In a severe and non-twilight way of course…
I don’t…and if that’s the ONLY way I can manage being hot, I’m giving up here and now. A unibrow? If that’s what’s hot, what am I supposed to do with these boobs?
This is why I firmly believe the saying, “babies are so cute because if they weren’t, their parents would drown them!” By the time they get to an age where they have their own opinions (God, that’s scary!!) we’ve gotten attached due to that previously mentioned cuteness that kept us from drowning them!
Many moons ago, I got into an argument with my brother and my Dad got mad. He said to me, “you always have to have the last word, don’t you?”
“No I don’t,” came my immediate reply.
*smack* across the back of the head.
HA!!! So deserved, but finally funny, many years later. 🙂