Mom, This Is Why You Should Be Glad *I* Couldn’t Text At 14.



Caolinn: OMG I just saw an ad for car loans, and the storyline was that this nerdy white kid was trying to pick up this 40-year-old lady on a street corner in a crappy car, and he says, ‘Car ruined my game’, so he gets a loan and winks at the camera with the woman in his new car. WHAT. EVEN.  He looks twelve and she was this middle-aged, independent black woman who had been throwing him some appropriate sass, and now is IN HIS CAR.  WHAT IS HAPPENING!? America!? Feminism!?

Me: What in the holy hell are you watching?

Caolinn: I have no idea.  I was watching Teen Wolf and right in the middle of it, the commercial break took a really weird turn.

Me: To be clear…in a show about a werewolf who plays high school basketball…things took a really weird turn.

Caolinn: I don’t have time to explain these things to you, Mother.

24 thoughts on “Mom, This Is Why You Should Be Glad *I* Couldn’t Text At 14.

  1. HA! At this point my response of the moment would have been something along the lines of,

    “…excuse me a minute, I need to throw out the encyclopedias now because it’s apparent you know every thing!”

  2. Hey why shouldn’t our youth believe in basketball playing lycanthropes, The USA twice elected George W. Who said magical things like… “You teach a child to read, and he or her will be able to pass a literacy test.” . or this gem.. “I’m the commander — see, I don’t need to explain — I do not need to explain why I say things. That’s the interesting thing about being president.”…or… “They misunderestimated me.”… but this one is my fave… “Do you have blacks, too?” –to Brazilian President Fernando Cardoso, Washington, D.C., Nov. 8, 2001 .

    The world is a magical place 🙂

  3. Reminds me of the time my (now ex) stepson criticized Toy Story for something unrealistic… and I reminded him he was picking holes in a movie where the toys secretly talk and have lives of their own. Hmmmm.

  4. elitosphere

    Uh, it’s lacrosse, and not basketball! And the show isn’t weird, it’s supernatural! Ugh, I don’t have time to explain these things to you, Mother!!

  5. How do you raise a kid with that level of media awareness? Thankfully all I’m combatting right now is that there are no such thing as space aliens, and the moon isn’t made of cheese, but I would love to hear what has worked for you given your daughter’s opinions.

    • Unfortunately, I have forces working against me. If it was up to me, she wouldn’t have had a phone until high school, and then it would have been a basic phone only. Her other (absentee, no less) parent, sent her an iPhone in the 8th grade. *sigh*

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