Son, Costco Doesn’t Make Enough Toilet Paper To Manage THAT Asshole Standard (The night before we left…) Liam: “Why aren’t we going to Russia?” Me: “Huh?” Liam: “We’re going to be right next to it when we’re in Alaska, so why aren’t we going there?” Me: “Dude…did you just Palin me? In my own house!?” Share this:TwitterFacebookEmailLinkedInPinterestTumblrRedditLike this:Like Loading... Related
18 thoughts on “Son, Costco Doesn’t Make Enough Toilet Paper To Manage THAT Asshole”
You’re gonna have to watch that one; but you knew that already… 😉
Agreed…he’s entirely shady. I’d like to claim this comes from his other family… (cough)
Naturally *cough cough*
Yes. Yes he did.
Dude, that Palin line is a heavy insult. Seriously, I keep trying to link up your photos/captions with the anecdotes below. You would not believe the time I spend trying to do this. I think it keeps me coming back for more.
It’s all part of my master plan. (shit…I’m supposed to have a plan, here?)
Are you sure you’re not some kind of one-person conspiracy? Wait, does that even make sense?
Maybe the conspiracy IS the conspiracy…
Excuse me as I make my way to the bar to think about this some more… thanks a lot!
Megan McMcerson…driving men to drink since ’78.
Now that’s a tag-line.
Shit…now, I have to change it.
You should totally prove to Liam how under-impressive Leif Eriksson’s so-called accomplishment was with this handy visual demonstrating the insignificant distance traversed:
Have fun with these ignorant and gullible years! (Have you told him about stop sign trees yet?)
Wait…what!? Stop sign trees!? TELL ME MORE!
Dang–WISH I could take credit, but when I was…oh…maybe 7 or 8, I read a very early Peanuts strip where Lucy was having fun lying to Linus about sh#t like this, and I was INSPIRED!!! Thank you C. Shultz!! I practiced on my brother, which made me much the better parent later (insert pic of devils on BOTH shoulders here).
Double devil shoulders! WIN!